GOODBYE MY LOVE
For the past seven years, I've been playing scrabble with my online friends. There's a few that became close till now. June pass away two years ago. But the person who is so close to me is Nancy, which I call her NANA. I still remember the first time I met her, it was just few months away from SEPT 11 trajedy. I told her, "for ur info, I'm a muslim and of malay heritage." And she replied, "It's ok Asni, my granddaughter roommate is also a muslim." There and then I knew that this special person, has a very good heart. From that very day, I get close to her. For seven years, we never lost contact. Even when the site has close and we manage to get another site. We never stop playing. As time pass, Nana was diagnosed with cancer of the throat. And it got worse each passing day.
From a jovial person, she became so quiet. But I understand her condition. Linda and me, we never fail to make her laugh with our stupid jokes. On the third of October, she seems to be so different. She is not so quiet. She laugh and jokes, as though she is not in pain. When I ask her, "are u feeling better Nana". She said yes. Much better. We never see her the next day onwards. She said she is having this radiation treatment, which is of high risk. Me and Linda told her that we will never stop praying for her. We waited and waited. She never turn up. Emails sent to her and her son David was never replied. Thinking that maybe they don't receive it, I sent her a get well card.
To my surprise, I receive an email from David. When I saw David's name, my heart beat so fast......
This is the email that I received:-
Asni, I am so sorry to have to give you this news, but my mother passed away on the 7th of October. I have not been very prompt in telling you this as I was trying to figure out a good way to tell you. I finally decided that there is no good way – we all miss her so much. I have a little girl, she is 10 years old and she wanted you to know that my mom died in my father’s arms and that she was in her home. She thinks that this is exactly how her grandmother would have wanted it and I think so too. My mom was a great mother and she left me with a good moral character, which I will pass, to my children. She very much liked you, and often talked about you and your family. She asked me many times if United Airlines (which I work for) flew to Singapore – she fancied the thought of traveling their to visit you. You were a good friend to her and you enriched her life. For that, I would like to thank you.My father (Bennie) is doing better than anyone could have expected. They were married for 57 years. For the last couple of years he has spent most of his time caring for mom. Now, the house must seem pretty empty for him. He still gets up in the morning and immediately goes to check on Mom, until he realizes again that she is not there. I was in Japan when my mother passed, but was able to get on a flight back home that left only 2 hours after I was told. My sister spent the first night with my dad and my family and I spent the next 5 nights. After a couple of nights on his own, he came down to visit my family and I for a few days. We have asked him to move in with us and he said maybe, but not anytime soon. We will keep asking him. I think it would be good for my family too. My dad would like to call you sometime, as you were close to my mom (her favorite). Would you mind sending me your telephone number and tell us the best time of day to call, so that he could do that? We don’t mean to intrude, but he would like to thank you for being such a good friend. If you have any questions please don’t hesitate to e-mail me (
Sincerely,
David May.
And this is my reply:-
Dear David,
Every single day, Me and Linda have been waiting for Nana. Every single day I pray that Nana will get better. Every single day when I on my PC I will go to our scrabble lobby looking for her. Every single day I talk to Linda about Nana, how is she doing now. The very last day I play with her, she is so different. She is so cheerful and she's trying to tell us that she is getting better. I think, the next day she pass away.David, while writing to you, I cried like a child. I can't control my tears. We have always dream of visiting each other. From the time I know her, she wanted to visit me. But because it was too early, Ben was scared that we don't know each other better. Up to the last moment we were together, we have been dreaming of visiting one another. I think, our hope was never granted. I never regret the time that we spend together, it was so wonderful. She was a kind and soft hearted lady that I know, through and through. She was the first person who open up to me.She is so special to me David. How much I luv her and miss her, words can't express it. Linda regret not asking her which hospital she is going to. We talk abt it everyday.Thinking that both of you didn;t receive my email. I send a card to her. And honestly, the card is gonna reach her in 2 to 3 days time. And I was hoping she would reply. I have been denying this feeling that Nana is not coming to play. I have sense it David. But I don't trust my own feeling. Even Linda was saying yesterday, Nana is not coming back is it. She ask me. Don't say that Linda, Nana is coming back. Oh my god, I can't stop crying David. I miss her....I miss my Nana.......I promise that when I visit her, I will cook for her breakfast, and Linda will cook lunch. And we will sit at the verandah playing scrabble, we will take very good care of her. We we always talking like this. And she would laugh.David, I lost June and now I lost Nana. From four of us, now left two. I am very thankful that you finally decided to break this sad news to us. Or else I will still be hoping and waiting at the lobby for her. Even though I can't accept it at this moment.Take good care my dear David. Send my luv to everyone and especially Ben. Thank him for taking good care of Nana. I will miss her FOREVER........This is my mobile number : 96707642But I don't know what is the country code. Maybe u can find out from ur service provider. The moment u receive this email is 12.33pm. You can tell Ben to call me after 8pm Singapore time. I don't know what time it will be there.
LUV
ASNI
This is Nana, her mother, her daughter and granddaughter
When I was talking to Linda and Jason who knows her, and our scrabble buddies too, zai bantot and jaja was online with me. I was still in tears......
This is what jaja say to me in her msn:-
Miss Bella Luna says absolutely zero . . says:
i know how it feels like. . .she has left the world but she has left a footprint of hers. .
Miss Bella Luna says absolutely zero . . says:
on u . .
asиi таии ™ sweet little kitty...... says:
yes
Miss Bella Luna says absolutely zero . . says:
so use that. . take whatever u have learn. . . keep it deep within u. . if shes beautiful. . beautify ur life with her memories. .
Miss Bella Luna says absolutely zero . . says:
that way. . shes always there. .
Miss Bella Luna says absolutely zero . . says:
its the hardest to lost someome so close to u. .
THANKS JAJA, AND EVERYONE WHO WAS BY MY SIDE AT THIS POINT OF TIME.
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OK...lets talk about pets.
THIS IS JEBAT...BOTH ARE SO CUTE.................
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JAJA AND PHILIP
Arry makan tak kenyang2
The teddy bear couple Yat n Cik Li 
Man and family just arrive and enjoying the food.
Ray, Hakimbelo and I don't know his name. They both are the first person to arrive and the last to leave.
Senyuman terpaksa....
Ni dia si Man, perasan handsome!!!
Ni Zai bantot and Seron misai
Ini anak aku Ifah and my niece Ira. Somehow or rather they both can click very well.
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Last sunday aku ada open hse. Punca nya aku bikin open hse ni pasal Phillip kawan jaja. Dia bersuara semasa dia berbuka disini. Jaja ajak mereka berkumpul di rumah Phillip. But he said I'm not cooking so whats the point. Why not ur house. So I can taste auntie's cooking. So I tell him ok. When the day is I'll confirm later. So I tell jaja, when the day is. Her reply was, we already decided to jalan raya ramai2 on the 11th October. So what happen I ask her. I don't know lah, later I ask Philip. I was rather piss off, but since I tell everyone, I have to proceed.
Penat setengah gila, but I'm elated cause, ramai yang datang. All those I invited came over. Except Nabil and Tristan. Because Philip gaduh ngan Tristan, so Tristan tak datang. But Nabil, who I expected to come, said he is buzy with his project. So I understand and I don't ask anymore. Semua yang datang tau Nabil is always here. So macam biasa semua orang tanya "mana Nabil"? and I have to answer to everyone. Kecoh kecoh.
Nevermind, next time tak nak bikin open hse lagi. Tak tahan penat. Sapa2 kalau nak rasa lauk raya aku, datang pada hari raya pertama, but malam. Tunggu sampai aku balek jalan raya. Tak kuasa nak masak2 lagi the same lauk. Akhir nya aku juga yang bertaggak mengemas sampai satu pagi. Nasib arry mop lantai. Kalau tak aku juga yang kena. Forget it lah. No more.
Aku orang nya suka berpegang pada janji. Dan aku benci pada orang yang suka mungkir janji. Ini juga adalah amanah yang harus kita tunaikan. Untuk lain tahun, insyaallah, kuih raya ja pun dah cukup. Bersyukur lah.
Hari tu, Ferdi ambil banyak gambar during the open hse. I'm still waiting for her to pass me the pic so I can post here. When the pic is available i will post it. Till then......
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Cuma yang geram tu, petang raya washing machine aku rosak. Bayangkan, mana nak masak lauk raya, mana basuh baju air bertakong. Nasib tahun ni, Jaja and Ifah banyak membantu untuk menyiapkan lauk2 raya. Tak lah aku penat sangat. Tahun2 yang sudah, selalu nya Arry yang banyak membantu. Tapi tahun ni lain pula, dia lebih banyak melayan kawan2 ke bazaar. Apa nak cakap, dah semakin dewasa.
Another kejutan is, tak pernah aku ke bazaar pada malam raya. Tapi tahun ni, Jaja paksa aku kerana nak cari baju raya last minute. Aku keluar pada pukol 11.30mlm. Pulang jam 2pagi. Selalu nya laki aku akan jadi penunggu bazaar tiap2 malam raya. Kali ini aku cakap dgn dia, duduk rumah, biar aku ja yang pergi. wakakaka.....
Pulang dari bazaar, Arry pun baru juga sampai, terus suruh aku pakai kan mask. Aku suruh jaja ja pakaikan. In the end, aku, arry, jaja and ifa semua pakai mask and kita tidur jam 3.30pagi. Sejarah seh. Ini dia gambar yang kita ambil pada hari raya. Walaupun beratus-ratus gambar yang dia orang ambil, cuma ini ja yang aku ada.
Aku bersama suami dan anak-anak.
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